18 June 2017
Happy Father’s Day to the pillar of #chiahouse
My dad is like an old kid (& we seriously call him that back at home). After my bro got his car, my dad is jealous of my bro’s ‘new toy’ and he too wants to get one. I accompanied him to BMW’s showroom at Alexandra Rd. He fell in love with X4 INSTANTLY. -.-” I am not a huge fans of cars but I don’t really feel comfortable with X4. The car is meant to be shared by the both of us and it has hell lots of buttons on its steering wheel. Even the signals confused me (with both left/right signal on the left hand side). I am super used to Honda already and I am not someone that breaks from habit easily. But everyone voted that as long as old man likes it, we will. The only condition is get a blue-black colored one. lol the whole family is sick and tired of red.
For Father’s Day Celebration, I finally get to buy dinner at our regular restaurant – The Seafood Republic @ Sentosa~ Spent 200+ SGD and I had a tough time convincing everyone to take just ONE family picture. lol. Have I mention that Koreans only celebrate one Parents’ Day?
Feeling super lucky that my boyfriend always put me first. 😀 During dinner, I really felt that we were one family.. to a point I could really imagine myself marrying this guy. I was initially poking him with a friend’s instagram – my friend posted a post with the caption “Why would I look at the stars when your eyes shine brighter than them?”. Immediately he asked me to look out the car window while he started tapping away on his phone. lol.
No help from google, nothing. Just fresh out of his mind. It made me smile even though there were some grammatical errors – but who cares! hehe.
…..but it seems like some kind of taboo in our relationship. Each time when we are super happy with our dates, it somehow will end up really bad at the end. Back at his place, we had an argument over my low self-esteem & it escalated quickly to tears (specifically me crying badly). And coincidentally while I was crying downstairs his place (i needed to be alone and he was actually hiding behind some pillar), I bumped into my your-eyes-are-brighter-than-stars friend. -.-” Anyway, we didn’t really resolve anything because of language barriers and he thinks that I am too stubborn and refuses to talk to me. At his defense, I can get really stubborn and only listen to what my mind says. All I caught from his argument was bad things, missing the whole main point. But at my own defense, the language and words used were really hurtful. His main point is just wanting me to stop feeling horrible about myself.
As usual, I felt really exhausted and tired of my relationship drama. It has been really dificult to fight. I started to question myself if was I even ready to be signed up for all these.
19 June 2017
Waking up, my body felt dead. I felt exhausted, both mentally and physically. With my curtains drawn, all I want is to isolate myself in the room, lie in bed and not do anything. I no longer can differentiate whether am I really happy. I felt loss, confused over what to do next. I dragged myself up to finish my work and continue to cry throughout the day. During this time, I requested Jo to leave me alone while I sort my feelings and thoughts out.
By evening, I somewhat recovered but still somewhat mad at his words. Fast forward to 10:30pm, I was craving for some junk food at Geylang Serai Ramadan Bazaar since I didn’t eat dinner, or probably just me stress eating. He came to look for me at the bazaar and i dont know is it because of a short cooling off period, seeing him felt different… different good.
We walked back to his place and I was trying my best to let go of all whatever negativity I was feeling. Now, making up is probably my new favorite thing. We started to clear the air up and after clearing all the negativity, I feel closer to him than ever.
Our relationship is tougher than any others but I guess it is what worth fighting for 🙂 As time goes by, I hope someday we’ll be strong too 🙂
that’s all, folks!